Beauty is short lived tyranny

I needed someone.... and there you were

2005-02-10T22:02:38Z

So the past almost 2 1/2 months have just been simply AMAZING. Specifically the last month, i've just been having so much fun its unbelievable. Its seriously the time in my life that i want to just move in slow motion and go on forever, like there were times in which i thought i was completely happy, but looking back on those... this by FAR surpasses it.

ahh... im just ♥ happy ♥

Anyone who talks to me about him can tell how much i care for him, they also know im not near ready to tell him that i love him, because i dont feel ready to... and i ABSOLUTELY love it! To be this happy and not even in love... its amazing... just makes me look foward to what is to come.

MY THEORY

I believe relationships are broken into thirds:
1/3 being the friendship portion
1/3 being the romantic portion
1/3 being the or physical part

when any of those supersedes the other, thats when relationships don't seem right or start to go downhill.

iono....just a thought

cuz the girls they are so pretty

2005-01-13T23:29:25Z

For those who do not know... Mike asked me out on Christmas
For those who are friends with Jerrad can hate me all they want
You don't even know how he got
Would you like to be called 15, or more times a day to have someone tell you how much of a bad person you are?.... how about those lovely voicemails and text messages i recieved while hanging out with Mike when we were friends... oh yes those were a blast!

"You fucking slut!, what? you cant respond, are you too busy fucking him?!?!, yeah, just go suck his dick you nig" - the words of Jerrad himself
now let me tell you, as GREAT as those made me feel, i had someone who was nice, good to me.... wasn't obsessed or jelous, not in it for some either, and he wanted to be with me. But not only that, but he told me he would wait around until things cleared up... and yanno what? I'm happy. Plain and simple. I'M HAPPY.

And if those people who are Jerrads friends, who i would have liked to consider mine as well a couple weeks ago, cant be happy for me because of him... then i chose the wrong friends

but before you judge me... what would you have done?

before you answer that... lemme tell you this... i was in the hospital and i had a break down and started freaking out when i woke up and tried to pull the iv outa my arm and whatnot... so my mom took my cell phone and called Mike and he calmed me down... made me breath and wasted his minutes while he was with his friends on the phone with me until i got out of the hospital... jerrad did know i was in there because he was too busy feeling bad for himself and calling me names and being a slut to me to even ask how i was....

a little update.... no guarantee when the next one is

2004-12-20T20:42:34Z

i got sick thursday and went home from school early....
.... stayed home sick on friday

at about 10:00pm on sunday
... my grandpa died

i broke down and bawled my eyes out right there at the work party
needless to say i left about 30 minutes after cuz i couldnt handle it
shes back in florida....
.... wont be home for christmas...
i dont get to spend christmas with my family

my car wouldnt start this morning.... for 2 hours.....
when it did.. the heat didnt work

i dont think ive ever had to try this hard to be happy and fail this badly
i wish i could just wipe away the tears for good....

I Hate Bonnievilles

2004-11-30T00:31:22Z

So Nicole and I are driving and ::ring:: there goes my phone, its mike....
(51 seconds later)....
BOOM.... ugly old Bonnieville with equally as ugly and older man hits me....
i cried
i cried
and
i cried
i was scared... Nicole was as well, but as the sweet friend she is, she tried calming me down, instead of freaking out like me(i ♥ you lots)

my mommy drove nicole home, and my brother drove with me to make sure i was okay....that was after i got the ticket and order to appear at court on december 14th.... sweet. so im getting 2 points on my license if they dont drop it..... grrrrr

<i ♥ you too... thanks babe>

Tell me is this world we live in all right?

2004-11-06T23:52:05Z

just curious

1.) What do you love about me?

2.) What do you hate about me?

Leave a name

what a lovely deal!

2004-10-27T20:30:11Z

for $5 bucks ill give you my parents...

yanno what? better yet...keep your money, ill pay you.. .PLLLLEASE TAKE THEM!!! oh come on people, i think im a pretty damn good friend when you're in need! help out a pal?

♥ Kimmie ♥

or is it that sound?

2004-10-21T23:52:15Z

surgery tomorrow morning.... 9:45....

cant eat after midnight, and wont be able to
for a couple of days

im eatin a lot now!!

i ♥ you!!

You're a turkey!!

2004-10-19T19:06:24Z

So im sittin here... enjoying my tea, hehe!!
(unintentional rhyming there)

like somehow you dont belong

I'm a wife and mother of Oedipus in the book....
creeeepppy...

and no one hears you screaming

i would have to say that i am in a dramatically better mood
nothings really changed, except the car isnt being sold... except by me
im just sick of my family's major suckage
so i ignore it

to be left out in the dark

whoooaa, amber is the color of your energy
whoooaa, shades of gold displaying naturally

anyways, i need to write this paper that was due today
or add to it...

i'll catch you cats and kittens later!

Is there love without hate?

2004-10-15T22:06:00Z

So i danced with Jerrad at homecoming, all of 2 times... my mom FLIPPED... i got to leave homecoming at 10:45... wow i am SWEET! and then i get home feelin all cool and im told that im a screw up, they are selling my car, and i wont have priviledges for a long time....

....then my parents decide that they are douche bags and take me and drive to jerrads and tell his parents and he that if we talk outside of school they will charge him with statutory rape... before that talk, i started to walk away and my stepdad walked after me and told me if i didnt stop he would beat me, and grabbed me by my arm as hard as he could and dragged me half way across the yard.

next morning.... talkin with my mom in her bathroom and i tell her i cant take the bus cuz i havent showered, she grabs the same arm hard as well and is like lets go, ur gettin on the bus, and i ask her to stop cuz it hurts and she smacks me... hmmm so that awakens my stepdad and he decides that since im standing by the door thats half way open to get angry with me and shove open the door, cut my heel and bruised my back...

this morning.... i go to call my mom who is awake but in midland and mike tells me not to, he says "the only person who will call your mother is the cops because you're all dead."....well thats just neat-o

so guess what?!?! according to them im a deciever, i lie like im 3, i need deep therapy, i am ignorant, irresponsible, AND arrogant!! so they call the therapist and tell her i want to come in and talk to her... we had a lovely talk today, and im so fortunate to see her on monday too... SCORE...

great parents i've got....

i need to get a job, save some more money, and get another car and then im gone... im fucking gone... but if they touch me once more ill fucking call the cops, or child services, maybe both.

kimmie_acious @ 2004-09-30T15:31:00

2004-09-30T19:47:32Z

Not looking foward to homecoming....
...ill end up eating at my house and going with my mom when she leaves for it

i wanna crawl outa my skin

everyone's welcome to come over and get ready here..
...come if you want

all the things i shoulda said

therapists suck, im glad mines on vacation
all she does is interrupt me and im like die

thats what u get for falling again

im not a very friendly person, ive come to realize
i come off as a bitch, not an attractive quality
i guess its so that i dont open up or let anyone in

wish it was raining cuz i hate every beautiful day

sorry guys i try to be happy and write happy entries
i do, i try, but its not working... iono what to do

Have you had ur protein today?

2004-09-22T01:06:19Z

I don't ever wanna be like you

so i got bored and made a collage..... hmmm what do u think??

You can handle your own affairs

"Beauty is just short-lived tyranny."

I'm not sure what to do about stuff right now, so i'll just eat.

I almost cried, just so frustrated, im not mean to anyone else, joking or not, im tired of it. It gets old. first time its a lil funny, 2nd its stupid and 3rd its gettin old and after 2 days u can just fuck off.... ok?

sorry for wasting your time

yes, im okay, a good cry'll do it

kimmie_acious @ 2004-09-18T18:41:00

2004-09-18T22:38:37Z

jus some pics to look at...

kimmie_acious @ 2004-09-15T15:43:00

2004-09-15T20:07:12Z

so i have an ovarian cyst...
thats why i was in so much pain last night.
WOW those things suck...
and its not gone...
i must monitor it.

dont keep me waiting

homecoming: 3 weeks

people change ~~but life goes on~~

i cant get mad or upset
if i do this cyst will explode
which all mounts to more pain
must stay calm
back and knees are hurtin too

hunny this mirror aint big enough for us both

im fallin apart... ur gunna find pieces of me....
ur gunna be walkin down the street and find an arm
or my love handles by the stairs... or my butt in
ur yard...I DONT WANT IT... DONT TRY TO GIVE IT BACK!

i walk around in the summer time sayin how bout this heat?

got my school pictures... my eyes are really blue
but they came out okay.... so its all good.
i dont understand people, eh, im over it!

<3kimmie

misery....

2004-09-12T16:35:12Z

when i touch you
can you feel it?

birthday party in Taylor...who woulda thought that since she was 80, almost everyone else at the party was around that age?

-"wow, i remember when you were this tall"-
-'yeaaaah, me too!'-

:::"you guys keep growing up, it makes me feel old":::
:::'thats cuz you are':::

I sware its my last time

IM GETTING SICK!!! OH NO.... MAKE ME ALL BETTER!!! FIX ME!!! pweeease?? id be forever in your gratitude....

when i fall will you catch me?

got a homecoming dress... its creme-ish gold... and like the 6 before, simple, elegant, with some rhinestones...nothing poofy, thats not my style

A-SS-HO-L-E

don't give up.... things are bound to get better in some aspect of your life, the troubles and down-spots are only temporary and will clear up... im sorry you are going through a tough time, but just stick in there, and remember that kimmie's always here to listen, or give advice if you ask for it...theres always someone who will make you happy in these times... find that person and talk to them... k?

....its what i feel when your not around

NICOLE I LOVE YOU!!!

and I sware....

2004-09-10T20:51:44Z

when i wake up, yes i kno im gunna be, im gunna be the one who wakes up next to you

So 6th hour im a T.I.E.S for a biology class of all guys... they all ask me to be their tie... EVERY DAY... aaah boys are ~~interesting~~

sometimes i park in handi-cap spaces while handi-capped people make handi-cap faces

i plan on spending the next two years in my house, in trouble... WAIIIITTT no, i lied, i can go to homecoming and Prom, neither of which i want to...i do math 4 u::

homecoming </br> + no date </br> = Kimmie no go

i kno exactly what goes on

Cris will come move in with me and sleep on my top bunk and then we will run reaaalllly fast and get on a plane and go to italy... it would be sweet.... but nooooooooo hes gotta be a booger and live in New Jersey... psssh... i will kidnap him... YES GOOD PLAN cuz i havent been there in a while... i will shove him in my suitcase when i fly back....EEXXCEEELLLENNNT!!!
....its my last time

2 words: nuclear FUCKING weapons

OHHHHHHHHHHH SHOT DOWN!! <-- haha im a LOOOOOSSSERRR

kimmie_acious @ 2004-09-02T22:54:00

2004-09-03T03:00:17Z

goin to my grandmas this weekend....

things are pretty shitty right now

i wish i were dead

im always the one to talk people outa thoughts like that

but i cant deal with it anymore

physically
emotionally
or mentally

i puke up my food
cant sleep....well here and there on teh b-room floor before i puke again

i was called a slut
skank
asshole
bitch
moron
and a fucking idiot

by the one who raised me

had things thrown and kicked at me
been ignored
asked if i kno what a baseball bat can do to my legs

why you ask?

my sister told something...why is beyond me...

i kept sooooo many of her secrets... but i guess that dont matter

lost my best friend too....

EXCELLENT...JUST FUCKING EXCELLENT

you make me go GRRRR.....

2004-08-25T04:25:18Z

well since everyone else is postin their schedules i figure why the hell not

ap euro
ap lit
ap bio
foods
trig
ties
i can cry if i want to

it is 12:25am on august 25th....yepp...its officially my birthday! woot woot...

happy birthday to me ::does a lil dance:: happy birthday to me....cha cha cha

registration sucked cuz i had to wake up...i didnt feel like showering so i made myself look pretty and showered when i got home....well maybe 5 or 6 hours after that.

got a card from my dad...nothing in it...but i should be so fortunate for that asshole to even remember....not gunna call him or thank him because i want him out of my life... the only time i will EVER see him again to to see my lil brother....he turned 5 in july.... breaks my heart to stay away

family is comin over tomorrow for cake and ice cream....if u wanna come over your welcome...iono what time it is but 248-529-6327 will give u the answer...even if i aint home...

OO OO im excited....

kimmie_acious @ 2004-08-16T13:57:00

2004-08-16T17:58:00Z

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JULIE!!!

top down

2004-08-12T20:50:59Z

10 more days until my birthday..... my sister is grossing me again with her questions about doing things...im like come on...figure it out on your own, i had to... plus shes older.... i mean how many people do you know who's older sisters ask them about how to give head?

im gunna roll with the top down seat back, rollin in my cadillac

i think im havin a party for my birthday... who should i invite????

hung out with nicole...went to jamies...lots of people, then joe nicole and i went to taco bell...and back to jamies and then he took us home...i paid sean gas money and he didnt take me anywhere, haha oh well, he says he will pay me back, but if he tries i will run away!

much luv!

.kimmie.

the story of me

2004-08-10T20:21:11Z

wow...im still sorry for that even though we are okay

.kimmie.

kimmie_acious @ 2004-08-08T12:10:00

2004-08-08T16:16:00Z

I think i am going to take after someone else and give up on live journal.... well because i dont like writting here..

i have other journals on a place called inthewire that i write and honestly its the only way that i can clear my mind because i really dont wanna talk about my problems on here and stuff well frankly cuz i dont really want you all to know especially if i have a problem with one of you....plus i dont think ya'll being my "friends" care much about my problems...

and i hate to be mean but i like my friends at inthwire a lot better well because i dont know most of them in person and they are really helpful instead of being sorry... i dunno ive been there longer....only since 2002... and if i have a problem i call someone i feel comfortable talking to...ha what am i talkin about...i write at the other journal place cuz i dont like to burden people with my problems...

ill prolly still write on here some like good news or whatnot...but its just not gunna be the same.... things have just been going haywire in my life and i dont want everyone to know about it and stuff, so once things cool down maybe ill continue writting..... who knows just fusterated with some people right now who dont care anyways....

248-529-6327
248-396-0793
aim- kimmie acious
email- gummybears067@comcast.net

now anyone who wants to can reach me some way

a house with a window

2004-08-08T03:24:53Z

went to michigan adventures today...had to get up at 5:00 oh yeah...im tired lol

blasted g to the hetto music on the way to the buses in friggen southfield and then proceeded to dance, insanely and sing, let me tell you...it was pretty! just like the happy boy says, sometimes you just gotta DANCE!! it works too, definately puts me in a good mood

went on the rip cord which they put like a harness thing on you and clip u to a rope wire thing and raise u 180 feet on an angle and you hear a speaker go 3 2 1 lfy and you pull a cord that drops you and you fly superman style...i giggled the whole way....

i actually had fun, i stuck with Ian the whole time...or rather he did with me because he likes my boobs and normally stalks me but he was really cool i had a fun time even though hes my little brothers friend and a freshman... we stuck around the waterpark the most, almost drownded i feared.

im having more confidence issues, eh but whats new? i need to talk to a certain someone about a certain problem that has been bothering me....haha yes! exactly!

im thinking i need to go spend some time with my livonia people....parties, sleepovers, stupid shit, god i miss them....i kno u all are terribly disappointed im leaving, but it happens....

lightbleedsclear: i'll pretend i have my kimmie with me!
lightbleedsclear: i'll talk to my imaginary kimmie all the time
(im going to hawaii....kinda, haha! shes the greatest!)

im out
.kimmie.

suck jobs?

2004-08-06T04:34:56Z

so i was sittin here mindin my own business and my sister walks in with a banana in hand and is like i need to know how to suck...will you show me? oh wow....might i mention my sister is older than me by 2 years? yeah....i didnt show her, i just told her....LMAO

julie called me to see if i wanted to go shopping, but i was gone and got her 3:45 phone call at ummmm 6:30... dang, i was babysittin instead of shopping. so she called me back when she got home...she such an amazing person..we have a lot in common :) then my mom came in and gave me a nasty look for being on the phone oh about an hour after im allowed to. ha then i was on the comp talkin to jerrad like 2 hours after i was supposed to be on it...so she came down again and i got another nasty look...so i got off about a half hour later..lol she didnt care

talked to jerrad for a long time today while i was babysittin for oh ummm 9 hours! 60 bucks for today woot woot! for once he understood where i was coming from on not calling people. he was fat and understands how it is not to be invited....i dont call anyone because im not going to invite myself anywhere. its cool when ur friends with people and then they start hanging out with similar people that you are and forget about you because everyone loves them. actually it just pisses me off...but hey! what am i gunna do about it? thats what i get for hanging out with different people during the summer...

ive been off grounding for almost a week and now im in one of those(above) moods....people are so stupid

ill be gone all day tomorrow i have to go to michigan adventures with my family thru my moms work, bah! and shes co-chaperoning the bus so we have to leave at 5:30 in the fucking morning... just fuck me!

will you float my boat?

2004-08-05T02:20:28Z

today blew monkey balls....this is a sucky entry, so just look at the one below it for reading material.

woke up, went with my sis to get her pay check then to the bank, hillers and target....all i got was new eye liner...cept i havent put make-up on in like a month and a half.

my nose is peeling....but my face isnt burnt anymore.

my birthday is in 3 weeks...my sister heard my mom mention doing something for it to my stepdad and he just say i dont wanna think about it... if its not one of them, its the other....fuckers...i didnt do anything to them.

ive decided more than likely i will go to the university of tampa for college. they sent me a big envelope with info and an admissions application form. and my GPA is high enough without readjustment for scholarships.... whats wrong with me? most seniors i know dont recieve these things and have no idea where to go

all i did was talk to jerrad on the phone today...that was rather emotional....pissed him off a lot because i dont consider myself as one of the girls that guys want to date....but its how i feel and what i think.

found out today im not gettin a new wrangler next year... grrr i have to save up because i will have to buy a new car during college and we all know that i wont have the cash as close being in florida....so its all on me this time..

i just wanna get outa my house!

you make me wanna LALA

2004-08-04T03:49:42Z

went to hooters today... felt a touch too at home with my orange skirt and white shirt and well my big hooters....haha i coulda just put a hooters shirt on and taken orders... sheesh!

you can dress me up in diamonds

got my 3 books that i have to read and take notes on by august 30th...i should start reading those...bah! ill have enough time so whats the rush? plus im lazy and i can read those in 3 1/2 hours and be done, but the notes....that puts the whole assignment at like 5 hours cuz its 3 books and notes....psssh

you can dress me up in dirt

i almost died 3 times today THREE! so what else did we do? we screamed, louder than the music the traffic the open windows and each other...we just SCREAMED...then laughed for 10 minutes afterwards

you can throw me like a lineman

i danced...you SHOULDA seen my moves! OH BABY! they were hot and old school... and some kid at mcdonalds liked my skirt...hmmm shoulda flashed some ass when he said 'i like her skirt' well not ass more like the spandex underneath cuz im a dork.....

i like it better when it hurts!

decided on the most pimp daddy outfit for me, but i have to figure out where to buy it now..i would tell you but nicole would steal my idea...so sorry! jus playin

you make me wanna LALA in the kitchen on the floor

i watch this guy as my picture dance and it depresses me cuz i thought i had some tight moved before i saw him....*tears* i mean DAMN those are the shit!

so....toga party, huh? oh yeah!